1. Walking down the aisle of a fucking bus.
2. You understand the “pool dilemma.” “You have to have a sash.”
3. Wearing itty-bitty booty shorts is tricky.
4. You can never wear full-bottom briefs. “Only G-strings exist in my life because it’s just, like, [aggressive hand-cupping motion] I don’t think I’ve ever owned full-bottom briefs. They just don’t work.”
5. You can’t find a flattering pair of white pants.
6. You have to stock up on Spanx.
7. People stare at you, but don’t compliment you to your face.
Our lives are hard af. Number 4 makes me cry.